6 weeks and providence

Tomorrow, Gideon is officially 6 weeks old.  When he was about 2 weeks old, I remember multiple people telling me to "enjoy it, this time goes by so fast."  And my response to that is, "It does, but it doesn't."  Being a mom is way different than I thought it would be.  There are wonderful moments, and there are super hard moments.  But when my little boy smiles at me his big, toothless grin, all those super hard moments melt away.  It's worth it.

I can't believe how big he is already.  He's smiling.  He's holding his head up on his own most of the time.  He's alert and making eye contact with us, following us as we move around the room.  He's a mostly happy baby, except when he's not.

But this week I made a realization.  It's one that a dear friend of mine told me that she felt in the first 3 months of motherhood, too, but then it got better.  My realization is that I'm not cut out to be a stay at home mom.  I love my son, and I know the first 3 months are the hardest, but I can't see myself being with him practically 24/7.  I will love him more if I can savor the time I have.

This realization was timed incredibly well.  On Monday night, I got a phone call for an interview, and they wanted me to come in on Tuesday afternoon.  I scrambled to find a friend who could watch Gideon for a few hours with less than 24 hours' notice.  My mom and I agreed it was important to make it work, since it seemed to fall into my lap; I'd applied for the job more than 2 months ago.

I went in to the interview, not expecting much and having barely prepared my brain to talk about how important it is to me to be a school social worker.  I was informed that there were 3 different positions available and that I'd hear in a week or two.

On Thursday morning, they called and offered me a job.  I was floored.  The job is an 80% position working 4 days a week between 2 elementary schools in the district.  Nick and I talked about the position and decided to go for it.  Now certain I didn't want to be a stay-at-home mom, even if it was financially feasible, I knew this was the right thing to do.

If there's ever a time to believe in God's providence, it's now.  At a time when I was feeling spent, tired, exhausted, and uncertain of my abilities in multiple areas of life, God opened the doors that needed to be opened.  He showed me a job that will provide for our family and allow me 3 days a week with my son alongside it.  A job that's with an age group I love, in a setting I'm passionate about, and right up my alley.

So, we're happy here at the Ehrenberg household.  Happy because Gideon slept 6.5 hours straight last night.  Happy because I have a job that will start in just over 2 months.  Happy because God has provided blessing in way more ways than we ever thought imaginable.  Just downright happy (even if we are still a bit exhausted!).