reflection

It's a quiet Friday morning at home.  The kind of mornings I love where the baby is napping, the dog is asleep on the couch next to me, and the Spotify is playing.

...

It took us a long time to get here this week.  And, honestly, it isn't how I pictured my Friday this week.  Last night I was angry, frustrated, and exhausted.  I had no patience.  And I was feeling guilty.  Because, honestly, I didn't want another day off with just me and the baby.

This isn't a pity post.  This isn't me reaching out for sympathy or empathy.  It's a thankful post.  Thankful we've gotten to this point.

Yesterday, we went to the clinic.  Gideon had had cold symptoms that seemed to worsen and worsen.  He wasn't napping at day care.  He was fussy and whiny, which is so uncharacteristic for him.  I had fears of ear infection.

Good news.  No ear infection.  Just a cold.  Could last 14 days (!).  Keep doing what you're doing.  Trust your instincts, mom, we're glad you brought him in.  He looks like a happy, healthy boy.  This too will pass.  Here's some saline drops if you need them.

No. No. No. No.  You mean you're not going to give me medicine that will fix him?  You mean I should stay home with him tomorrow instead of send him to daycare like I'd planned, but he'll probably be a pill to take care of?  You mean I have to cancel my plans for tomorrow?  You mean I took a half day off of work for you to tell me you can't really do anything?

Except I did get something out of it.  I got peace of mind.  I know my baby's okay.  And I know he'll get better.  In fact, he's better today than yesterday.  Is he still sick? Absolutely.  But does he cuddle a little more when he's sick?  Yes.  Does he nurse a bit longer, curled up close to me?  Yes, please.

Last night I didn't want today to come.  I was dreading spending yet another day with my almost-8-month-old.  Let's be honest, we all have days like that.  It doesn't make me less of a mom to dread a day of wiping a snotty nose, short naps, and whining even when we're not tired.

But God blessed us with a solid night of sleep, which hadn't happened since Sunday night.  He gave us a morning wake up time after 6am, which is pure gold these days.  And now?  He's been napping for 2 hours.  2. hours.  He hasn't done that in the morning for almost 2 weeks.

So, we're getting there.  Spotify is playing.  Dog is next to me on the couch.  Slippers are on.  Baby is napping.  Laundry should be done (it might not be today).  Groceries will be bought later.  High today of 32.

Sweet mercy.  Blessings.  What else could I ask for?

6 months, 7 months, and more!

It's been a long time since posting!  It's incredible to me how time can fly between working 4 days a week, checking things off your weekly to-do list, and a million other things on the calendar!

In November, this little boy turned 6 months old!  It flew by so quickly, but was so fun.  During his 6th month, we celebrated Thanksgiving and saw LOTS of snow.

 In December, this cutie turned 7 months old!  He's showing off 2 bottom teeth and still loves to smile, laugh, and giggle.  He loves to throw things on the floor and watch them fall, and then enjoys someone picking them up for him :)

We spent our first Christmas experience at Grandma and Grandpa Ehrenberg's house.

We learned this boy loves boys from gifts and eating them (of course!).  It was a lovely first Christmas and this little boy was SPOILED!

 Then, we took our very first plane trip to see Oma, Papa, Granny, and more family in North Carolina.  G met Granny for the first time, along with a lot of cousins and other family members.  Spoiled again, this boy had a great time!

Early morning Christmas napping...

 Playing with sweet Miss Paisley and new toys.

Playing with Auntie Anita - she sure knows how to play with little babies!

Goodnight time with Uncle Jack. 

It was a great extended Christmastime!  We're so blessed to have spent time with loving family both near and far and miss them all already.  Can't wait to see them again soon!

Home.

Normally I blog about life updates, especially those surrounding Gideon.  And I know I've been remiss in posting as of late; the truth is, life has become busy and the hours that we have at home together are precious few.  Our weekends have been packed.

But today I want to just blog a little bit about myself.  About home.

This weekend I said goodbye to my childhood home.  My parents are moving to North Carolina a week from today.  It's something they've been longing to do for a while, and they're finally making it happen.  They'll be living with my grandma and spending time with my mom's side of the family, and enjoying much, much milder winters than those they've experienced for over 30 years in Iowa.  I'm so happy for the decision they've made and I know they're eager to get going.

But I'd be lying if I said it was an easy weekend.  Time with my parents is always sweet and it's so fun to watch them as grandparents with Gideon.  But as the weekend wore on, it became so very real to me how many "lasts" I was experiencing.  It was my last weekend in that house, the house I lived in for the first 22 years of my life.

My parents' house is what, in my mind, I still think of as "home."  I know that there are lots of sayings about home... "Home is where the heart is" and "Home is wherever I am with you."  And in that sense of the word, I am at home with Nick and Gideon.  But in terms of a house, the house on 6th Avenue in Sioux Center, Iowa is home.  It's where I ripped the wallpaper off in my bedroom when I was mad about taking a nap (I was 2).  It's where I learned to cook and bake.  It's where I spend countless summers in the basement with friends.  It's where I hung the laundry out on the line.  It's where I experienced family for the first and most influential time in my life.  It's where I moved back after a rough semester in college.

So, I'm sentimental about losing my "home."  I know that when we go visit my parents in North Carolina at Christmastime, some of those feelings will be there... they will be there, some of the familiar things of home will be there.  But I know it will never feel like going home like driving down to Iowa has felt like going home to me.

And then, today, I spent the day working on paperwork, making phone calls, and doing my job as a social worker.  And as I drove home, I reflected on how many of my students have likely never lived in a house.  Or, if they have, there's a good chance they've not lived in the same house all their life.  I remember one student saying they've only lived in an apartment.  Another is considered "highly mobile" because her family has moved more than once in the past school year.

And that gives me perspective.  As much as I'm mourning the sense of losing my "home," I think about countless others who don't have a place that they can consistently call home.  Or don't know what it feels like to rip the wallpaper off of their wall at nap time, but are just happy to have a bed (or a couch) to sleep in.

So, I'm sad to have said goodbye to my childhood home.  It's hard.  But I had a great, blessed childhood where I was lucky enough to live in the same house in a stable environment.  And I'm beyond thankful for that.

(story time with Papa.  Melts my heart.)

5 months

Gideon turns 5 months old today.  It's amazing how much our lives have changed in the last 5 months.  This week I was reflecting on the things that we do now that have become habit: nursing, washing diapers, putting the baby down for a nap, changing diaper after diaper, getting everyone ready in the morning.  I couldn't have imagined what it would be like, but I'm grateful the process was a fairly easy one for us!

Gideon has now been alive in 3 seasons: spring, summer, and fall.  One website says that it takes about 5 months to adjust to motherhood.  It feels like a big step for us - he's no longer a newborn and has much more of a personality than he used to.

Here are the highlights:

• Eating rice cereal, carrots, and sweet potatoes (his favorite!)
• Loves to jump in the Johnny Jump Up and play in his exersaucer
• Loves to grab toys
• Is still fascinated by patterns, bright colors, and smiles
• Is happy in almost anyone's arms
• Is a favorite at daycare; one girl likes to sing to him when he's crying at naptime to help him fall asleep
• Sits on your lap with a bit of assistance
• Can pull himself up with his legs when someone holds his hands for support
• Loves to "pet" (read: pull on the fur) the dog
• Super ticklish on his tummy
• Loves to eat his toes (especially in the bathtub!)

Rolls over both directions (sometimes - mostly by accident!)

Trying sweet potatoes for the first time

 Fun Friday mornings with mom

What a little ham...

Friday Photos

It's been another week over here.  Nothing over the moon exciting has happened, though we continue to have a happy boy on our hands.  That's such a blessing, we know, so we're happy to just go with it!

Gideon playing with his new spoon... basically anything in his hands is a toy :-)

Exploring and getting familiar with the dog.  You may notice Holly the dog doesn't really have a choice about this... 

I can eat this furry thing?  It looks like it'd be fun to suck the fur!

Messy face after dinner

These are my toes.  I love to play with my toes.

Friday Fun: Solids!

This week, we started our little man on "solid" food.  I mean, as much as you can call liquidy rice cereal "solid."

I'd always imagined we'd be late starters with solid food.  After all, he has the whole rest of his life to eat solid food, so why rush it?  This little man had a different plan: This week, he started craving more to eat, eyeing our food jealously, and getting hungrier in the middle of the night.  So, in a desperate attempt to stop his waking in the middle of the night, we started solids.  It was worth it.

Let me just say, it's fun.  He loves to grab for the food, sometimes swallows the food, and makes a big mess of himself.  It makes me laugh!

Friday Fun

Happy fall, everyone! (Okay, I know it's not "officially" until Sunday, but I love that it finally feels that way!)  Here at our house, we have a fondness for long pants, long sleeves, sweatshirts, and footie pajamas.  Because a certain baby runs hot like his mama, we haven't been able to wear footie pajamas over the summer unless we want to sweat, sweat, sweat! So, I'm happy to welcome fall and put on some of those cute footie pajamas we've had in the drawer all these months.

We've had a great week with lots of activity - here are a few pictures to share!

Some of my fave footie pajamas :)

Finally tall enough and strong enough to be in the Johnny Jump Up.  And he loves it.  So do we.

Our little man got his first cold this week... he was a little more snuggly about it, which I won't complain about! I sure did feel badly, though, when he had 3-4 sneezes in a row.  Poor kid.  We're much better now!

Oma and Papa visited for the weekend.  We took a trip to the Children's Museum - sure to be our first of many!

With Papa at the Children's Museum

Watching daddy play piano

We also decided to invest in an exersaucer (thanks, Once Upon a Child!) - he's a huge fan of being able to "stand" on his own and make noise with the toys around him.  Plus, it gives him a great view of the puppy :)